290

Wordsworth wrote an endless poem in blank verse on” the growth of a poet’s mind.”  I shall attempt a more modest feat for a more distracted age: a blog, “Things which a Lifetime of Trying to Be a Poet has Taught Me.”

Sometimes, when you opponents are incapable of responding to a serious argument, there is nothing left to do but make fun of them.

ANTI-INTELLECTUALISM

(Including Limerick # 58)

 

The Thought Police will inspect you all,

Interrogate and dissect you all

Lest the horrible plague should infect you all

Which has threatened e’er now to have wrecked you all.

If it has, they will surely detect you all

And pursue you until they have decked you all.

Your excuses will prove ineffectual

And the members will rightly reject you all

For trying to be intellectual.

 

Though I really can’t say I have checked you all,

With all of these rhymes, I expect you all

To be duly impressed

By my passing the test

And not using Lord Byron’s “hen pecked, you all.”

Remember: for more poetry like this, go to https://lanternhollow.wordpress.com/store/ and order Stars Through the Clouds! Also look for Inklings of Reality and Reflections from Plato’s Cave, Williams’ newest books from Lantern Hollow Press: Evangelical essays in pursuit of Truth, Goodness, and Beauty.  And look for Williams’ very latest books: Deeper Magic: The Theology behind the Writings of C. S. Lewis (Baltimore: Square Halo Books, 2016), An Encouraging Thought: The Christian Worldview in the Writings of L. R. R. Tolkien (Cambridge, OH: Christian Publishing House, 2018), and The Young Christian’s Survival Guide: Common Questions Young Christians Are Asked about God, the Bible, and the Christian Faith Answered (Cambridge, OH: Christian Publishing House, 2019)!  Order from the publisher or Amazon.

289

Wordsworth wrote an endless poem in blank verse on” the growth of a poet’s mind.”  I shall attempt a more modest feat for a more distracted age: a blog, “Things which a Lifetime of Trying to Be a Poet has Taught Me.”

Shades of grey?  I prefer black and white.

IN BLACK AND WHITE

What’s that on the zebra’s back,

Black on white or white on black?

Conundrum to befuddle sight:

White on black or black on white?

Was the contrast then so stark

When Noah shooed them on the Ark?

Had they still such perplexing skin

When he let them off again?

Did Shem and Japheth hold debate

When the stormy nights got late

Over what the proper term is

For their divided epidermis?

Since we still cannot decide

How best to analyze their hide,

Let us leave them to the scholars

Who wear the black/white, backwards collars!

Remember: for more poetry like this, go to https://lanternhollow.wordpress.com/store/ and order Stars Through the Clouds! Also look for Inklings of Reality and Reflections from Plato’s Cave, Williams’ newest books from Lantern Hollow Press: Evangelical essays in pursuit of Truth, Goodness, and Beauty.  And look for Williams’ very latest books: Deeper Magic: The Theology behind the Writings of C. S. Lewis (Baltimore: Square Halo Books, 2016), An Encouraging Thought: The Christian Worldview in the Writings of L. R. R. Tolkien (Cambridge, OH: Christian Publishing House, 2018), and The Young Christian’s Survival Guide: Common Questions Young Christians Are Asked about God, the Bible, and the Christian Faith Answered (Cambridge, OH: Christian Publishing House, 2019)!  Order from the publisher or Amazon.

The Book

288

Wordsworth wrote an endless poem in blank verse on” the growth of a poet’s mind.”  I shall attempt a more modest feat for a more distracted age: a blog, “Things which a Lifetime of Trying to Be a Poet has Taught Me.”

What comes after Post-Modernism?  Post-Post-Modernism?  Then Post-Post-Post-Modernism?  However silly the name, let’s get there already!  It can hardly be much worse.

Satirical verse? Swift would have approved!

LINES ON POST-MODERNISM

Modernity’s paternity

Produces Post-Modernity,

Where Power is the only good

That can by man be understood.

So Truth is just a sly digression

To serve the interests of Oppression

And anything that sounds sermonic

Just deconstructs to the ironic,

False oppressive rabbit trails

From Dead White European Males.

Extra syllables are the bargain

That we get by using jargon.

Extra meaning?  Don’t be square!

There wasn’t ever any there.

Jargon!  Would you like a sample?

Consider this one, for example:

We don’t “write books” (the old construction);

Now we call it “text production,”

Where, doubling syllables, we add

The sly hint that the old is bad.

Words of beauty, verse that rhymes,

Are not suited to the times.

Rhythm and alliteration

Are a vile abomination.

Like the plague, all now do flee

Metaphor and Simile.

Detect an Author in the Text?

You’ll want to find a Meaning next!

If any ‘twixt the lines is tucked,

Poof!  We make it deconstruct.

We abhor the putrid scent

Of old Authorial Intent.

In our hermeneutic blender,

Everything’s reduced to Gender:

Illustrations of the sin

Of Dead White European Men.

If the work makes any sense,

It only proves the author’s dense

And is a vain and snobbish prig.

For Meaning, then, give not a fig!

Only an archaizing fool

Would break this, our most basic rule.

No, let him not ask us to read

Aught with meanings there to heed.

Fractured prose, thoughts torn asunder,

Fill the reader’s heart with wonder

And leave her with no grounds to tell

The path to Heaven from that to Hell;

And sets us free to fill the nation

With any old Interpretation,

Immune from being proven wrong

Or right.  And thus the Muses’ song

Becomes (it’s our firm resolution)

An instrument of prostitution

Designed to keep us (aren’t we clever?)

In our tenured jobs forever!

Derrida–Post-Modernist Guru

Remember: for more poetry like this, go to https://lanternhollow.wordpress.com/store/ and order Stars Through the Clouds! Also look for Inklings of Reality and Reflections from Plato’s Cave, Williams’ newest books from Lantern Hollow Press: Evangelical essays in pursuit of Truth, Goodness, and Beauty.  And look for Williams’ very latest books: Deeper Magic: The Theology behind the Writings of C. S. Lewis (Baltimore: Square Halo Books, 2016), An Encouraging Thought: The Christian Worldview in the Writings of L. R. R. Tolkien (Cambridge, OH: Christian Publishing House, 2018), and The Young Christian’s Survival Guide: Common Questions Young Christians Are Asked about God, the Bible, and the Christian Faith Answered (Cambridge, OH: Christian Publishing House, 2019)!  Order from the publisher or Amazon.

286

Wordsworth wrote an endless poem in blank verse on” the growth of a poet’s mind.”  I shall attempt a more modest feat for a more distracted age: a blog, “Things which a Lifetime of Trying to Be a Poet has Taught Me.”

C. S. Lewis posing as an illustration of this poem

LITERATURE: A SATIRE

It seems that some shy intellectual Brit

(Most likely a snob and most surely a twit)

Gets hit

By a fit

Of maniacal wit

That causes his neurons to splutter and split.

Well, once this gets started, he just cannot quit

‘Til out he does spit

A story that has at least one naughty bit.

And when this mad fit

Has finally flit,

He finds he has writ,

And that’s how we get

The very great bulk of our classical lit

Which exists so that critics can critic their crit

And so Christians can grit

Their teeth as they sit

In bold and peremptory judgment on it

And condemn every whit,

Seeing no reason why they should admit

That so to conclude

Without reading a word

Would be horribly rude,

Not to mention absurd,

For they already know that it comes from the pit!

Dr. Samuel Johnson, trying to read this poem

Remember: for more poetry like this, go to https://lanternhollow.wordpress.com/store/ and order Stars Through the Clouds! Also look for Inklings of Reality and Reflections from Plato’s Cave, Williams’ newest books from Lantern Hollow Press: Evangelical essays in pursuit of Truth, Goodness, and Beauty.  And look for Williams’ very latest books: Deeper Magic: The Theology behind the Writings of C. S. Lewis (Baltimore: Square Halo Books, 2016), An Encouraging Thought: The Christian Worldview in the Writings of L. R. R. Tolkien (Cambridge, OH: Christian Publishing House, 2018), and The Young Christian’s Survival Guide: Common Questions Young Christians Are Asked about God, the Bible, and the Christian Faith Answered (Cambridge, OH: Christian Publishing House, 2019)!  Order from the publisher or Amazon.

 

282

Wordsworth wrote an endless poem in blank verse on” the growth of a poet’s mind.”  I shall attempt a more modest feat for a more distracted age: a blog, “Things which a Lifetime of Trying to Be a Poet has Taught Me.”

The title of this poem is an oxymoron.  That’s the point.

Jacques Derrida–the Father of PoMo

THE LOGIC OF POST-MODERNISM

“Logic’s nothing but a verbal trick,”

Post-Modern thinkers often like to claim.

They work quite hard to make that judgment stick.

All those who don’t agree are simply thick,

Incompetent to play the language game

Where logic’s nothing but a verbal trick.

It’s all a plot by Dead White Males to kick

Non-Westerners and keep them meek and tame?

Well, that’s one way to make their judgment stick.

“Is there a Text in this class?”  Don’t be quick

To ask if there’s a prof to ask the same,

For logic’s nothing but a verbal trick.

All truth is surreptitious rhetoric,

For words call only other words by name;

The will to power makes this judgment stick!

You say it all sounds just a bit too slick?

Shh!  Shh!  Don’t give the game away—for shame!

If Logic’s nothing but a verbal trick,

What logic then can make that judgment stick?

Remember: for more poetry like this, go to https://lanternhollow.wordpress.com/store/ and order Stars Through the Clouds! Also look for Inklings of Reality and Reflections from Plato’s Cave, Williams’ newest books from Lantern Hollow Press: Evangelical essays in pursuit of Truth, Goodness, and Beauty.  And look for Williams’ very latest books: Deeper Magic: The Theology behind the Writings of C. S. Lewis (Baltimore: Square Halo Books, 2016), An Encouraging Thought: The Christian Worldview in the Writings of L. R. R. Tolkien (Cambridge, OH: Christian Publishing House, 2018), and The Young Christian’s Survival Guide: Common Questions Young Christians Are Asked about God, the Bible, and the Christian Faith Answered (Cambridge, OH: Christian Publishing House, 2019)!  Order from the publisher or Amazon.